summercomfort | (no subject)

So I went to see the new doctor today. She was ... all right. Everything felt very procedural. Here's the list of things to watch out for in early pregnancy. Here's the stuff you should do based on the medical intake form that you filled out. It felt very assembly-line, and I guess that makes sense, since from her perspective it *is* an assembly line: figure out which week the patient is at, and go from there. There was even a part where she was clearly like running down a mental checklist and hit the "check in re: mental health" and suddenly pulled her chair close and softened her voice. And I'm like o.O;;;

There's also a lot of ... default expectations? Like, that I would breastfeed, and that I would want a natural delivery with a midwife present. (She offered to have my next appointment be with one of the midwives that they have on staff....) And, like, those are two things that I'm actually not sure of? My mom had pre-scheduled c-section both times, and reading up on it, there's something very comforting about having a scheduled and controlled procedure. Like, I keep hearing about folks who have hours upon hours of labor, with the start time and the duration being pretty much unknown. And in comparison, an hour-long surgery doesn't sound bad at all???

Similarly, she's like "oh, you might have problem latching, so you'll probably need to talk to one of our lactation specialists." I was reading about breastfeeding a few days ago, and apparently if it's working well it's a once-every-few-hours type thing, and it'd also be something that only I can do (versus if we have formula, the task can be shared between me and Jono.) So once again I'm kinda like, "I'd like to think this through a bit more thankyouverymuch"

I guess I'm just being resistant to the whole assembly-line expectations stuff.

And the most fun and exciting is how apparently I'm supposed to get about 30 minutes of good exercise every day, and I'm like "lol"