summercomfort (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
summercomfort) wrote2005-07-19 12:50 am
summercomfort) wrote2005-07-19 12:50 am
(no subject)
Been busy-ish the last few days. (re: not lazing about watching tv)
Saturday: shopping w/ daddy, gumi picnic (it was nice seeing everyone again, but everyone was in an early afternoon nap zone), reading of Harry Potter until weeee hours of morning. I am appreciative of the plot and the characters, but not so much of the writing. Am also quite appreciative of the Non Heroic Death, which JK Rowling seems to favor. Am quite looking forward to everything concluding in the final book. I mean, horcruxes, RAB, etc etc.
Sunday: whoo, boy. So I was supposed to sub for a teacher because she fractured her ankle by falling down the stairs to her new home while carrying her year-old baby. >_<;; That went all right. Second class time, there was the Incident. Basically, there was a fight during the first period, and the children went home, and then the parents discover a kiwi-sized bruise on their kids chest. They march back, demand to speak with the other kid+parents+teacher, made incessant demands that we expel the other kid, and sat around being indignant. So finally the other parent shows up.
BoyA: He called me retarded, so I called him retarded back, and then he called me fatboy, and then I said shut up, and then he punched me! ::sniffle::
ParentsA: GLARE. How can you be so cruel? What sort of person are you to strike my child so brutally? Have you no morals?
BoyB: I only hit him because he was trying to kick me.
ParentsA: ROLLS EYES. "Trying." And so you punch him that hard?
BoyB: This is what happened. He has been teasing me in class all year, calling me a retard and saying mean things whenever I make a mistake. Today during recess, he called me retard again, so I called him a retard and a fatass, and then he tried to kick me, so I ran away. He came chasing after me and kept on trying to kick me, so I turned and punched him lightly to get him to stop. He didn't, so I kept on punching him lightly in self defense, because he was chasing me.** By then it's been several minutes, and I figured I can't run the whole recess, and what happens when recess ends? So I punched him really hard and ran until I lost him. When I came back from recess, however, he was waiting by the door and he punched me.
BoyA: No, you punched me first! ::tear::
ParentsA: Our kid would not say bad words or be violent. It must be because you provoked him. Did you punch him first?
BoyB: Yes, I was the first to punch, but that's because he tried to kick me first.
ParentsA: "TRIED!" And for that you punch him to leave such a bruise?
BoyB: .. No.... I ran away. I only punched him that hard when...
ParentsA: How can I believe a word you say? First you don't say that you punch first, and just now you admit to punching first and instigating the attack. You're obviously a malicious liar, and I have no reason to believe your story
BoyB: That is not what I said
ParentsA: You're 13, three years older than our son. How can you be so heartless, bullying a younger kid? We're going to give our kid a checkup, and we will hold you responsible for any injury
ParentB: Well, it's not just my son that was doing the hitting. He came home with a hurt shoulder, as well, but y'know, they're just two boys. What kid doesn't get into scuffles? It's rare to leave such a large bruise, and we are definitely willing to pay for any hospital expenses, but ...
ParentsA: well OUR kid never starts fights. He's always the victim. It was the same last time! He got a black eye when another kid hit him for no reason!* That time, we just changed to a different class. No more this time! The school should really take a stance on this expell this kid!
ParentB, Teachers, Everyone: ... o.O;;;
But anyway, they demanded that the school expell the kid. Mom said that 1) both the kids should learn their lesson from this incident, and 2) KidB's family should compensate for resulting injury. FamilyA stomp off to the Emergency room.
That night, after getting back from a dinner party, we find a letter in our mailbox, narrating a strongly biased version of events, faulting the negligence of the school, demanding the expulsion of KidB and a schoolwide reiteration of our no-fighting policy, as well as an attached medical statement from the doctor saying that KidA has a chest contusion with damaged blood vessels, and has taken an X-ray to check for broken ribs (none). They wanted an official school response by Wednesday.
Today, they've called to say:
a) they've talked to a lawyer
b) they have been emotionally injured by this event and the whole family plan on seeing a psychologist. (The parents were apparents so hurt by the event that they were unable to go to work today, and instead spent today talking to the school district and their lawyer and the hospital).
c) They say if their demands are not agreed to by Wednesday, they will sue the school and ParentsB, and picket outside our school every day. (We were planning on suspending KidB for a few weeks, as per the California Education Code bit about physical injury. But they said that we're a private school/business, and so shouldn't follow the public school code).
In other words, unless we expel the kid, not only would we get into a legal tangle, but the FamilyB would have to pay for psychiatric expenses, lawyer expenses, and subject their kid to the ickiness of being the defendent. Um, yeah. Can you say "total headache"?
I mean, technically, we *can* go to a court of law and say our piece***, but that would put the kids under undue pressure, and it's really just so senseless. So we may expell KidB, but find ways to comfort/compensate him. Cause he really is a good kid.
----------
* what actually happened was that KidA blocked the door at recess and taunted KidC, KidC got annoyed and punched him, KidA's cheekbone had a small peanut-sized bruise.
** I find out later that KidB used to be picked on a lot in English school, once coming home with a giant lump on his head, so naturally he equate "self defense" with "punching until the other guy backs down". (Not that it's excusable behavior, but that's where he's coming from)
*** I mean, if you want to talk emotional injury, KidB woke up crying this morning, plus the crying he did after the other family left (he's got a stiff upper lip, that one), plus I personally would consider FamilyA's interrogations and accusations quite improper.
Saturday: shopping w/ daddy, gumi picnic (it was nice seeing everyone again, but everyone was in an early afternoon nap zone), reading of Harry Potter until weeee hours of morning. I am appreciative of the plot and the characters, but not so much of the writing. Am also quite appreciative of the Non Heroic Death, which JK Rowling seems to favor. Am quite looking forward to everything concluding in the final book. I mean, horcruxes, RAB, etc etc.
Sunday: whoo, boy. So I was supposed to sub for a teacher because she fractured her ankle by falling down the stairs to her new home while carrying her year-old baby. >_<;; That went all right. Second class time, there was the Incident. Basically, there was a fight during the first period, and the children went home, and then the parents discover a kiwi-sized bruise on their kids chest. They march back, demand to speak with the other kid+parents+teacher, made incessant demands that we expel the other kid, and sat around being indignant. So finally the other parent shows up.
BoyA: He called me retarded, so I called him retarded back, and then he called me fatboy, and then I said shut up, and then he punched me! ::sniffle::
ParentsA: GLARE. How can you be so cruel? What sort of person are you to strike my child so brutally? Have you no morals?
BoyB: I only hit him because he was trying to kick me.
ParentsA: ROLLS EYES. "Trying." And so you punch him that hard?
BoyB: This is what happened. He has been teasing me in class all year, calling me a retard and saying mean things whenever I make a mistake. Today during recess, he called me retard again, so I called him a retard and a fatass, and then he tried to kick me, so I ran away. He came chasing after me and kept on trying to kick me, so I turned and punched him lightly to get him to stop. He didn't, so I kept on punching him lightly in self defense, because he was chasing me.** By then it's been several minutes, and I figured I can't run the whole recess, and what happens when recess ends? So I punched him really hard and ran until I lost him. When I came back from recess, however, he was waiting by the door and he punched me.
BoyA: No, you punched me first! ::tear::
ParentsA: Our kid would not say bad words or be violent. It must be because you provoked him. Did you punch him first?
BoyB: Yes, I was the first to punch, but that's because he tried to kick me first.
ParentsA: "TRIED!" And for that you punch him to leave such a bruise?
BoyB: .. No.... I ran away. I only punched him that hard when...
ParentsA: How can I believe a word you say? First you don't say that you punch first, and just now you admit to punching first and instigating the attack. You're obviously a malicious liar, and I have no reason to believe your story
BoyB: That is not what I said
ParentsA: You're 13, three years older than our son. How can you be so heartless, bullying a younger kid? We're going to give our kid a checkup, and we will hold you responsible for any injury
ParentB: Well, it's not just my son that was doing the hitting. He came home with a hurt shoulder, as well, but y'know, they're just two boys. What kid doesn't get into scuffles? It's rare to leave such a large bruise, and we are definitely willing to pay for any hospital expenses, but ...
ParentsA: well OUR kid never starts fights. He's always the victim. It was the same last time! He got a black eye when another kid hit him for no reason!* That time, we just changed to a different class. No more this time! The school should really take a stance on this expell this kid!
ParentB, Teachers, Everyone: ... o.O;;;
But anyway, they demanded that the school expell the kid. Mom said that 1) both the kids should learn their lesson from this incident, and 2) KidB's family should compensate for resulting injury. FamilyA stomp off to the Emergency room.
That night, after getting back from a dinner party, we find a letter in our mailbox, narrating a strongly biased version of events, faulting the negligence of the school, demanding the expulsion of KidB and a schoolwide reiteration of our no-fighting policy, as well as an attached medical statement from the doctor saying that KidA has a chest contusion with damaged blood vessels, and has taken an X-ray to check for broken ribs (none). They wanted an official school response by Wednesday.
Today, they've called to say:
a) they've talked to a lawyer
b) they have been emotionally injured by this event and the whole family plan on seeing a psychologist. (The parents were apparents so hurt by the event that they were unable to go to work today, and instead spent today talking to the school district and their lawyer and the hospital).
c) They say if their demands are not agreed to by Wednesday, they will sue the school and ParentsB, and picket outside our school every day. (We were planning on suspending KidB for a few weeks, as per the California Education Code bit about physical injury. But they said that we're a private school/business, and so shouldn't follow the public school code).
In other words, unless we expel the kid, not only would we get into a legal tangle, but the FamilyB would have to pay for psychiatric expenses, lawyer expenses, and subject their kid to the ickiness of being the defendent. Um, yeah. Can you say "total headache"?
I mean, technically, we *can* go to a court of law and say our piece***, but that would put the kids under undue pressure, and it's really just so senseless. So we may expell KidB, but find ways to comfort/compensate him. Cause he really is a good kid.
----------
* what actually happened was that KidA blocked the door at recess and taunted KidC, KidC got annoyed and punched him, KidA's cheekbone had a small peanut-sized bruise.
** I find out later that KidB used to be picked on a lot in English school, once coming home with a giant lump on his head, so naturally he equate "self defense" with "punching until the other guy backs down". (Not that it's excusable behavior, but that's where he's coming from)
*** I mean, if you want to talk emotional injury, KidB woke up crying this morning, plus the crying he did after the other family left (he's got a stiff upper lip, that one), plus I personally would consider FamilyA's interrogations and accusations quite improper.
no subject
I hope things work out, and that people come to their senses soon....
no subject
I would suggest standing up for KidB and not expelling him, but then I'm used to having free legal representation should I ever need it. So I guess that's just what I think would happen in a perfect world. Just remember that a lot of people threaten lawsuits but don't follow through on it, because it's expensive and time-consuming and often exposes what they did wrong as well.
I hope things work out okay for you and the various kids involved.
no subject