summercomfort (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
summercomfort) wrote2003-03-30 07:30 pm
summercomfort) wrote2003-03-30 07:30 pm
First posting the stuff written at airport. Later will go through everyone's entries. I'm back OL!
Came to me friday night when I couldn't sleep. Yeah, sappy, done before, unedited, all that. But the mood came and this came. Finally got a chance to write it down so that it can stop jabbering in my head.
Heero found himself standing beside his bed, gun in hand. (Duo had wondered how he was able to keep a gun *and* wear spandex shorts. He had decided that Duo doesn't have enough security clearance to know about the operation) And Duo is the reason he's up. Reflexes kicking in, he aimed his gun at the whimpering Duo's right shoulder.
If it weren't for the efficiency and convenience of rooming with a Gundam pilot for the upcoming mission (no worried questions about night scouting missions and all the blueprints he had around the room), Heero would not have tolerated the inconvenience of Duo's constant babbling. And now, the night before the mission, here he was, up in the middle of the night, *not* getting the rest he needs to have optimum mission execution tomorrow, all because a pilot decides to have a nightmare. (He has long trained himself to skip the REM stage of the sleep cycle.) Well, there is only one thing he can do now. (Actually, three things: He can attempt to sleep with the noise, which isn't difficult, just very grating on his nerves, and may induce REM. He can stay awake, which is even worse, because affeine pills cannot replace sleep. Or he can try to stop the noise.)
Returning his gun, he walked over the 9 feet to Duo's side of the room, and examined the options. He can just muffle him with a handkerchief. But then he doesn't want tension for tomorrow. He doesn't want to hear snoring for the rest of the night, either. On the bed (and under a plethora of posters of Duo's favorite aniime and bands), Duo stirred again, murmurring, "kill them all...." Was it pre-mission jitters, then? Heero knew that Duo became quite manical during missions (he bugged Deathscythe's outgoing comm system after he noticed that Duo liked to turn it off during battle.) Just when Heero was pondering his other options (move to another room, hook Duo up to Deathscythe, put on some music to drown out the aggravating noises), a leg abandoned the comforter and swung towards him. Heero caught the leg automatically and turned Duo back on his back.
Duo quieted at the touch, leaving Heero trembling. (Actually, body tense from restraining the trembling.) It had been so long since he had touched anyone without intent to kill. Heero stood, staring down at the mass of flesh and bones snoring lightly. He knew all the joints and points to push to disable it. He had been trained to distinguish the skeleton and where a bullet can be fatal. But he had kept himself from human contact. It was much easier to communicate with Wing. After all, he knew how Wing worked, and machines are, after all, simpler than humans. (for example, machines don't wake one up unnecessarily in the middle of the night.) Control. He loved the obedience of the machines. He lived happily with things he can control, keeping everything else at bay with a gun and a glare. It's easier that way, Dr. J told him. Heero agreed. Life is deciding which side to be on, and then carrying out the mission. One decision, the rest is automatic, controlled. However, there are times when he wanted the touch of warm flesh. A pat on the back, a friendly punch, or even just a smile, a real smile that comes unbidden....
Heero stood over Duo's bed for a few shuddering seconds, staring at the hand that hung at the edge of the bed. He wanted to touch it. He also wanted to shoot it. Slowly, he moved and covered Duo in the comforter that he had tossed, hands hovering over Duo's hand for a second, and then turning abruptly back towards his bed.
As Heero inserted himself back in the warm comforting envelope of his bed and got into the most healthy sleep position (on the right side, less pressure on the heart), he sighed happily. Whether at the silence that was *his*, or the touch that wasn't.
::sigh:: I'm such a sappy fool. Which makes me not very good at writing such cold practical scary people as Heero.
Anyway, here's a snippet of my dream last night:
I was in this small room, and these two figures are there. I knew they were kinda phantom-like and stuff. I was in a half-kneel. Anyway, I ask who they are, and the beautiful woman lifted my chin and looked me in the eye and said, "Call me Denethor Annala. No one may call me by my real name, A--" (A-something, I don't remember, it was fuzzy). So then I started calling her Lady A-- (god, this is starting to look like an Austen novel). Then I asked who was the old woman sitting beside her (DA was standing, next to the bed, but the old woman was kneeling on the bed, with a drum. Y'know, the typical anime old woman) And DA said, "She is babacho. We are your guides." That is when I knew it was a piece-together dream, because Babacho *is not* an old woman. Another thing that was strange was that I knew I was a man in this dream (a knight), and I was strongly attracted to DA. o.O And I know I've had this dream before. Or at least something similar, with DA in it. Makes me wonder about previous lives and alternate universes and all that.
Heero found himself standing beside his bed, gun in hand. (Duo had wondered how he was able to keep a gun *and* wear spandex shorts. He had decided that Duo doesn't have enough security clearance to know about the operation) And Duo is the reason he's up. Reflexes kicking in, he aimed his gun at the whimpering Duo's right shoulder.
If it weren't for the efficiency and convenience of rooming with a Gundam pilot for the upcoming mission (no worried questions about night scouting missions and all the blueprints he had around the room), Heero would not have tolerated the inconvenience of Duo's constant babbling. And now, the night before the mission, here he was, up in the middle of the night, *not* getting the rest he needs to have optimum mission execution tomorrow, all because a pilot decides to have a nightmare. (He has long trained himself to skip the REM stage of the sleep cycle.) Well, there is only one thing he can do now. (Actually, three things: He can attempt to sleep with the noise, which isn't difficult, just very grating on his nerves, and may induce REM. He can stay awake, which is even worse, because affeine pills cannot replace sleep. Or he can try to stop the noise.)
Returning his gun, he walked over the 9 feet to Duo's side of the room, and examined the options. He can just muffle him with a handkerchief. But then he doesn't want tension for tomorrow. He doesn't want to hear snoring for the rest of the night, either. On the bed (and under a plethora of posters of Duo's favorite aniime and bands), Duo stirred again, murmurring, "kill them all...." Was it pre-mission jitters, then? Heero knew that Duo became quite manical during missions (he bugged Deathscythe's outgoing comm system after he noticed that Duo liked to turn it off during battle.) Just when Heero was pondering his other options (move to another room, hook Duo up to Deathscythe, put on some music to drown out the aggravating noises), a leg abandoned the comforter and swung towards him. Heero caught the leg automatically and turned Duo back on his back.
Duo quieted at the touch, leaving Heero trembling. (Actually, body tense from restraining the trembling.) It had been so long since he had touched anyone without intent to kill. Heero stood, staring down at the mass of flesh and bones snoring lightly. He knew all the joints and points to push to disable it. He had been trained to distinguish the skeleton and where a bullet can be fatal. But he had kept himself from human contact. It was much easier to communicate with Wing. After all, he knew how Wing worked, and machines are, after all, simpler than humans. (for example, machines don't wake one up unnecessarily in the middle of the night.) Control. He loved the obedience of the machines. He lived happily with things he can control, keeping everything else at bay with a gun and a glare. It's easier that way, Dr. J told him. Heero agreed. Life is deciding which side to be on, and then carrying out the mission. One decision, the rest is automatic, controlled. However, there are times when he wanted the touch of warm flesh. A pat on the back, a friendly punch, or even just a smile, a real smile that comes unbidden....
Heero stood over Duo's bed for a few shuddering seconds, staring at the hand that hung at the edge of the bed. He wanted to touch it. He also wanted to shoot it. Slowly, he moved and covered Duo in the comforter that he had tossed, hands hovering over Duo's hand for a second, and then turning abruptly back towards his bed.
As Heero inserted himself back in the warm comforting envelope of his bed and got into the most healthy sleep position (on the right side, less pressure on the heart), he sighed happily. Whether at the silence that was *his*, or the touch that wasn't.
::sigh:: I'm such a sappy fool. Which makes me not very good at writing such cold practical scary people as Heero.
Anyway, here's a snippet of my dream last night:
I was in this small room, and these two figures are there. I knew they were kinda phantom-like and stuff. I was in a half-kneel. Anyway, I ask who they are, and the beautiful woman lifted my chin and looked me in the eye and said, "Call me Denethor Annala. No one may call me by my real name, A--" (A-something, I don't remember, it was fuzzy). So then I started calling her Lady A-- (god, this is starting to look like an Austen novel). Then I asked who was the old woman sitting beside her (DA was standing, next to the bed, but the old woman was kneeling on the bed, with a drum. Y'know, the typical anime old woman) And DA said, "She is babacho. We are your guides." That is when I knew it was a piece-together dream, because Babacho *is not* an old woman. Another thing that was strange was that I knew I was a man in this dream (a knight), and I was strongly attracted to DA. o.O And I know I've had this dream before. Or at least something similar, with DA in it. Makes me wonder about previous lives and alternate universes and all that.