summercomfort: (Default)
2017-07-09 03:59 pm

3 weeks left

Faculty orientation starts Aug 10. I don't feel ready at all. I'm slowly wrapping up all the work that I currently have, and even though I feel like I'm working all the time, I also feel like I've done nothing.

Was Independence Day only 5 days ago? It feels like forever.

Plus the baby is sick again, so even though it's probably due to a multitude of compounding factors, I can't but help like I could have done more. Wiped her hands more frequently. Adjusted her layers more frequently. Watched her 24/7, etc. Of course, it's not rational, and I don't want to hover. But it's also hard, to watch the baby suffer, when there's this niggling feeling that said suffering could have been avoided. (But at what cost? I don't want to cut her off from all human contact. And the temperature this summer has been very variable. And I *have* to be able to trust her to others' care, be that my parents, Hoosband, or, in the future, the daycare people.)

So I keep going.

I've wrapped up a lot of my fandom stuff in anticipation of school starting, which feels very good. There's a few things left (3 unfinished fics, some add-ons to wrangle, some mailing to do), but already I'm feeling the gears shifting away from fandom. I've got some more ideas of things to draw for The Rutabaga Project, I should get sbaycomics straightened out enough to apply for ECCC, I need to start lesson prepping for the new school year, etc etc.

On the work side, I'm looking forward to having some solid work days. I think I can get all of my work done if I can just focus for a while. (Of course, said focus is easier when I'm not short on sleep due to baby illness or too many things on the brain...)

But anyways, slowly, bit by bit, I'll get there. August 10th. Then I'll only have 1 or 2 things on my brain, instead of 10.
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-07-03 10:13 am

Monday!

It's not exactly a holiday but sort of a holiday, which means it's a quiet workday!

Goals:
- get all the fanstuff ready to post
--- finish drafting RBB comic
--- finish inking RBB comic
--- finish inking steeb bday comic
--- shade RBB comic
--- color steeb bday comic

- get HCC website stuff ready to go
--- Make G8-AP page content
--- update images in G5-7 and G8-9 online hw pages
--- double-check that all of the help pages have been moved over
--- duplicate the parentadvice page to make middle school and high school parent advice pages
--- make New School ordering guide
--- make new School Support

Long-shot stuff:
- Make new Video pages
- send textbook covers and cd labels to printers
- process checks and deposit them. (remember to ask about that monthly $30 charge on personal acct)
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-06-27 05:33 pm

(no subject)

Hoosband complains that all my posts here are to do lists.

That is true. It's much easier to make a to do list and focus on Getting Shit Done, than to think about how sick my babbos is right now. (answer: very sick. I'm hoping it's roseola and not anything worse)

Anyway, a small todo list for me to check off in the next 2 days:

- download all the talk videos from sprout and re-combine them. Then re-upload them to sprout
- make new video pages from said videos, properly timed
- if have time: make screenshots
- move the teacher-specific bits of G1-10 pages onto the support side
- Make G8-AP page content
- make the G1-7 pages pretty
- duplicate the G1-4 Online hw page to make G5-7, G8-9, and K online hw pages
- add lesson structure info to the online hw pages
- make online hw screencaps
- double-check that all of the help pages have been moved over
- duplicate the parentadvice page to make middle school and high school parent advice pages
- make New School ordering guide
- make new School Support
- go to the bank to deposit checks (remember to ask about that monthly $30 charge on personal acct)
- go to ups store to mail stuff
- send updated textbook covers and cd labels to printers
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-05-29 04:16 pm

(no subject)

I should have done more work today but instead I spent most of it napping. :/

This week:
Tomorrow--
- look at student essay book proofs
- process checks

Wednesday:
- finish misc data input
- make grade level website pages

Thursday:
- make more grade level website pages
- finish doing payroll (write checks)

Friday:
- start planning Real Summer HW

Also this week: HTB layout
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-05-18 12:53 am

Well, that's that

Over the last few days, I've been having some personal angst because the transition of our company (as I'm leaving to do teaching) has hit me rougher than expected. There's been a lot of personnel turmoil, and I was having a hard time accepting the person that my mom wanted to pick as the manager, because I felt like he was often brusque and dismissive of other people.

But yanno what?
(A) That's a difference of communication style. I think he still cares a lot about the company and wants to take it overall in the right direction, and
(B) I'm not working there starting August, so
----(a) the communication difference won't be an issue, and
----(b) I really have no say in the this decision -- I was the one to abandon the company first, so I can't be butthurt about the company moving on without me.

So I'm gonna do my best to wrap up my work, and look forward to teaching again! (omg, classroom interaction, control over my own curriculum, having colleagues that I know better how to socialize with ... ::excite::)

(Incidentally, I'm also trying to wrap up my fandom work, so... I guess I'm ending much of the stuff I've been dedicated to in the last 3 years. No wonder I'm feeling so much emotion about this!)
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-05-16 10:37 am

The only way out is through

These last few weeks, oy vey. A lot of various family members being sick. Rutabaga fell and slit her head open and had to get staples (there's staples! in her head! wtf!). There has been office upheaval, and I'm behind on everything.

But: I found a daycare for Aurora that starts in September that I think will be good for her -- it's next to work, so there's more commuting involved, but the people speak Chinese, has a program that goes all the way up to pre-K, and seem like good people.

There's been so much work drama that I'm at a stage where I... just don't care anymore. I'll finish my projects, pass stuff to the next manager person, and then I'll be outta here.

- The Shuihu text is completely unedited and is taking me a long time to even align the paragraphs to the sound files. I have 5 weeks' content left to do, which translates to 10 hours.
- I have no idea how the LuluFeifei text is going to go, seeing as I stole it from the internet. But it *seems* shorter, which would maybe make it 5 hours' work?
- I need to set up the Chunleiji collections for print, which should take me a day.
- I need a day just to focus on finance stuff.
- There's some graduation stuff that maybe I can hand off.
- There's also some fandom work that I need to do.
- We have one Ben visiting this weekend and another Ben visiting next weekend.

So, time allotments this week:
Tuesday:
1-5pm: Shuihu + Graduation
9-11pm: Lineart

Wednesday:
1-5pm: Shuihu
9-11pm: HTB

Thursday:
9am-12pm: Shuihu
1pm-3pm: Lulu
3-5pm: meetings
9-11pm: HTB

Friday:
1-4pm: Lulu
4pm: pick up Ben

Sunday:
1-5pm: Chunleiji
9-11pm: HTB

Then I can polish off Chunleiji stuff on next Monday and send it off to the printers.
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-04-24 10:50 pm

To Do

Well, my new teaching job is going to start on Aug 11, and so ... got a lot of stuff I need to finish before then.

I think I'm going to take tomorrow off and just schlump. (Well, actually I'm going to hold the baby until 11:30am and then run various errands 5:15pm, and then go pick her up. Which is kind of like taking a day off because I will reward myself with poke and doing art and home errands instead of Work Errands.)

Stuff to do in the next few days:

Home things:
- mail out stuff
- start looking for daycare
- write thank you notes to my references, maybe sneak in and put in their faculty mailboxes?
- write responses to school welcome emails
- update website
- sort/move comics, also the hallway closet

Work things:
- fix the faces on G3-4 artwork
- data entry for summer homework
- make PPT slides for mom's talk
- keep working on improving the website (urg I'm so fucking tired of everyone being like "oh we should do this" but no one actually doing the thing.)

Art things:
- post rutabaga comic
- draft the comic bit for the fic person
- draw some HTB stuff
- write some RBB fic
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-04-11 03:04 pm

(no subject)

Yesterday and the first half of today has been very mopey due to reasons, but I think switching back to my old glasses is helping a bit, as is just having some quiet time to myself. All right, let's take this one day at a time.

To Dos:

Today:
- boil bottles
- set up computers for AP testing
- write list of webinar topics
- make website flow chart, and start moving things in that direction
- eat lunch
- look at summer homework and see what I can do
- find my W2
- fold laundry
- take shower

Tonight:
- file taxes
- write some more of RBB fic
- prepare stuff for tomorrow's interview
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-03-22 02:45 pm

to dos

- write MVLA cover letter
- email G1 docs to Li Jia
- finish this chunk of fic and send it off
- buy resume paper!!
- make PPTs and docs for Friday's demo lesson
- bunch of Chinese School stuff
-- sort checks, write tuition return checks, find AP checks
-- write video waiver
-- email teachers who need 1099-misc, and also new office lady
- draw rutabaga birthday comic
- apply for temp sales permit for 4/21
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-03-12 05:07 pm

to do list

too many things in brain, need to dump out so that can sort.

Read more... )
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-03-08 11:22 pm

(no subject)

In other news, I'm cutting Chocolate out of my life. It's the last vice I have left and I'm sad to see it go, but the amount of chocolate I've been consuming has become unsustainable.

:/

Adulting. It happens.

(Between Hoosband's ban on most meats and my no-chocolate and half-carb, I guess we can now eat exactly 3 things.)
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-03-08 10:18 pm

Recent realizations

So I was taking the train to SF and updating my resumé, and I was like:
1) Wow, I used to be pretty competent and do a lot of stuff! That's what I'm capable of if I turn my full attention to something!
2) Imagine if I turned my full attention to my current work! Wait, why do I not do that? (Maybe because I'm not as interested in my current work?)
3) Oh geez my life is so fragmented. And I keep doing things to make it more so.

This winter has been rough. This week might be the first week since Dec 6th that me or a member of my family hasn't been sick. And that just serves as a reminder that life is short and I'm getting older. What should I turn my mind to and focus my energy on in the mean time?

Maybe not fandom.

This may be just part of that cyclical antsiness that happens every few months or so, but... I feel like I've been dedicating waaaay too much of my life recently to organizing fandom things. Yes, getting things done efficiently and organizing large groups of people is something I enjoy. Yes, I've gotten to meet new cool people on the chats that I wouldn't have known/met otherwise. But it's also an awful lot of time that I could have used to focus on other things.

I mean, it's callous to say this, but ... I have other friends, and other creative projects. And I may be neglecting them in favor of all this online stuff. That sucks. And I got along well enough without fandom for 10 years.

It's heady, to be part of a larger creative community like this. To have a tumblr blog that has 2000+ followers. To have people to talk to about art and storytelling and character relationships. This is all stuff that I craved when I was working on Tisquantum and feeling so isolated. But it's also really fragmented my life. I feel like it's been 3 years since I've really felt the thrill of being completely focused on implementing something.

(Yet another reminder that I need to get back into teaching.)

So, what should I do? Gradually phase fandom out of my life? (Just wrap up the projects I currently have going, and not start any new ones...) Or is there still a place for it to stay? I worry that there's a baseline amount of "maintenance" required just to stay in the fandom (reading fics, interacting with people) that I'm not able to sustain if I want to go back to teaching and stuff.

But I'd miss my friends. :/

(But I'll miss friends no matter what.)

Sigh.
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-02-24 11:11 pm

slowing down, catching up

Man, having random back problems pop up out of nowhere on Sunday night totally messed up my week. :/

And now I have a lot of catch-up to do.

Well, nowadays I feel like I *always* have a lot of catch-up to do.

BUT, things that I should really do in this coming week:
- Get my JOB APP SHIT together
- Finish the sound editing and image editing for G8 and G9 (halfway there!!)
- email that rando fanart fest librarian -- is he still running it?
- Next Sunday is the Symposium/Gala thing!

I think I should take a fanart break and get my websites sorted out --
- I need to host my AO3 images on my own server instead of hotlinking from tumblr (very unreliable).
- I need to set up soupycomics.com

Unfort this next week will also be pretty busy on the CapRBB front. :/
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-02-01 10:20 am

thoughts

- The milk that I really like is only available in half-gallons, and is $4 instead of $3. That means I'm both paying more, *and* creating more plastic recycling. But if I buy normal gallon milk, I drink probably half as much milk, which leads to slower milk consumption and a need to buy half-gallons...

- Wow, politics, wow.

- But let me write this down here, before I forget it -- I think it's important that we start teaching about the signs and actions of early Fascism, and not just "Hitler is bad because WWII and Holocaust." Because that's too late. Like, we need to figure out exactly what about early 1930s Nazism and Fascism that's bad. What's so different between a civil works program in the US vs. in Germany at the time? (Maybe because one just puts people to work, and the other glorifies a certain ideology.)

- I've been feeling a bit unbalanced of late -- once again, too many things that I want to do, it's a hot mess. Which is the actual point of this post: to take a step back and prioritize.

There's work and baby-holding, which are both kind of immutable and persistent. But outside of that, I have a desire to make things, and a desire for social interactions. I think the problem is figuring out how best to do both those things. Recently, I joined a fandom chat channel which has been lots of fun, but has severely cut into the time for making things. :/. So I need to quarantine that a bit.

Making Things
- Draft some more Rutabaga comics
- Draft RBB prewar genderbend Stucky
- 4F fic
- I need to do an action study, so that I can get better at drawing action. (Punching, bullets flying through the air, etc.)
- prompt comic that needs action
- pics of Steve punching Nazis in the face

Social Stuff
- Hangouts with husband
- Hangouts with comickers
- Hangouts with non-comicker friends
- Writing to existing fandom friends
- RBB modding
- writing HTB2 reqs

I'm going to do a time tracking thing for the next week or so, just to see how much time I spend on each type of thing. :)
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-01-05 11:28 pm

Easy "reblogging" a specific public post or comment thread

I just made the following suggesting to the DW Suggestions Box, but wanted to post it here for safekeeping:


Summary: One-click to share someone else' public post to your own journal or community, possibly also highlighting a specific comment thread within that post.


Deets:
Right now, when I see a public post on my Reading page that I want to share with my subscribers, I have to manually copy the link of that post into a new post, as well as a snippet of that original post, and maybe some of the relevant comments that I want to highlight/comment on. It'd be cool if there was an easier way of doing that.

Some ideas of implementation:
- have a "share on my journal" link on public (unlocked) entries. Clicking on that will automatically create a new post draft that has the link to the original entry, the text of the original entry, as well as links to the comments section of the original entry. This way would be pretty clunky, but probably works the most within the existing structure of posting.

- Better: Clicking on the "share on my journal" link will basically show the original entry on my journal, with the original poster's info on the top left corner of the entry, to indicate that it's not originally mine. Clicking on the "comments" section will go directly to that original entry's comments section, and if that person edits their entry, the changes automatically happens on the shared entry, because it's actually just the same entry. Basically it's just showing the same entry content, just on a different journal.

Some considerations:
- I think only public entries should be shareable -- these are entries that are composed for a wider audience. But then -- would you be allowed to lock/remove a shared public entry? Or to edit a shared public entry?
---> On the editing front, having the ability to edit means that if you made a mistake, you can correct it instead of having the wrong information propagate. But having the ability to edit also means that you can edit your entry to say something completely different. So... maybe once an entry is shared, you can only edit-to-append, but not edit-to-delete?
---> On the locking front, I feel like once an entry is shared, it's now part of the common discourse, and one person (even the original poster) shouldn't have the ability to then remove it from said discourse. But maybe if the original poster doesn't want to deal with it anymore, they can lock or remove it from their own journal, but the entry will still show up on journals that have shared it. In this case, locking or removing it means that the original poster no longer gets notifications about it, and is no longer viewable on the original poster's journal, and the original poster attribution is removed from the entry.

- Sharing a particular comment thread: Sometimes, what I want to share isn't just the original entry, but discussion in a specific comment thread. What would be the best way to share that? Maybe there can be a "share this comment" link (as a paid feature?) that allows me to share a version of entry with the selected comment appended to it (along with the standard "view thread" links, as relevant.) Like:
[entry text]
| Highlighted comment: [comment text]
| [standard comment links]
[standard entry links]
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-01-03 10:04 pm

2017 New Year's Resolutions

2016 Resolutions: How did I do? )

2017 Resolutions

Chew all that I have bitten off. I've been letting too many things slide. This resolution is twofold: one, chew more, and two, bite off less.

Create a consistent creativity "brand." I've dabbled all over the place. I think it's time to consolidate and be know for one thing (or a few related things), instead of a hodgepodge. Creating soupycomics would help. And also I've printed a few anthologies at this point, so maybe more of that, too?

Find satisfaction in creative work. This one sounds a bit nebulous, but what I mean is that my creative work should not be stressful. My time is so precious anyway, I should just do the things I want to do, and improve at a pace that feels comfortable. Sometimes I feel like I spend a lot of time doing creative-adjacent things, like organizing or managing. I'm good at that, but it's ultimately not that satisfying.

Optimize social interactions. This is related to the previous, which is that I want to make sure my hangouts and fandom interactions (exchanges, etc) are likewise non-stressful. There are many types of social interactions. I should aim for the ones that make me feel rejuvenated and not ones that make me feel tired or hollow.

Successful job transition. Get the company to a good place, wrap up the majority of the webapp, and find a teacher job that I'd like. ::knock on wood::
summercomfort: (Default)
2017-01-01 12:59 am

2016 --> 2017

Well, that sure was a year! I believe last year at this time, I was on my way home from the taiko NYE performance at a fancy-pants hotel party, and 6 months pregnant. And this year -- well, Rutabaga goes to bed at 9pm every night, so we're basically at home by 8:45pm latest.

It's funny how I *finally* hit a good groove re: work, and then the baby happens. Alas. And then next year is going to be more craziness as I attempt to return to teaching history.

One of the personal challenges of this past year has been finding my center again after the baby, and... I'm not sure if I have, quite yet. I enjoy hanging out with the baby, she's pretty cool as far as babies go. But it's also meant a lot of my energy (mental, emotional, and physical) is spent paying attention to her. For example, yesterday was my birthday. Usually on my birthday I'm generally pretty self-indulgent -- I'd spend some time doing "me" things, like drawing or fixing my website or going to the movies, and then in the evening I'd have dinner with my parents, have a cake, chat about stuff. But this year, it was a pretty regular baby-holding day, except for the 3 baby-free hours when I went to watch Moana, and then the dinner was mostly spent keeping an eye on the baby. It's like the majority of my "me" time is crunched down into the 3 hours between Rutabaga going to bed and when I go to bed. That's... not a lot of time, especially if I also need time to decompress.

(There was an animated short tacked onto Moana that was about yet another middle-aged man feeling penned in by a boring 1980s office worker job, and I was like "why aren't there more things about new moms feeling penned in by the compromises they have to make post-baby?")

Like, I think it will be worth it in the long run -- Rutabaga's gonna be a rad young lady. But in the mean time, it's hard to see the forest for the trees, and all I can do is make plans and try to do my best to execute those plans. (Even if I don't quite have the energy to evaluate whether those are still good plans, I guess I gotta just trust my past-self.)

One of the things I've really come to value in 2016 are human connections. My parents have helped so much with baby care, I can't even. And even though it's hard to manage sometimes with Rutabaga's schedule, it's been great having comics night every Thursday and taiko every Saturday. (10 comics people came to help us move! And taiko people are always so helpful with Rutabaga!) Hanging out with these people always leave me with warm fuzzies. It's the energizing kind of socialization, not the draining kind. :D I do wish I had more energy to reach out to non-local friends, however -- thank them for gifts, or just to say hi.

Another thing that's been pretty frustrating to me, is that I've just become a much flakier person, with an ever-growing list of things that I've promised to do, but which I just haven't followed through on. :/

And part of the reason is that I've been trying to protect my creative time. When I go too long without making something, I get really pent-up and antsy. I think it's because making stuff is like -- high quality downtime. (Whereas surfing the internet is low-grade downtime.) So after 9pm, I basically refuse to do work -- I need that time to decompress and make things.

Which gets to the other lack-of-centering, because even though I've been working on creative stuff, I don't have a single goal or project. I've worked on a bunch of miscellaneous ones over the year, and I've gotten better at various skills, but I'm missing a throughline. (Or maybe I have a throughline, I just haven't had the time and mental energy to really reflect on it.)
- I now have 3 anthologies and 6 fanzines under my belt, so I feel like I've leveled up on the "wrangling artists, design-and-layout, promo-and-shipping" front. I'm good at organization, but ... there's other stuff that I can be doing. (Is it the new "knitting" of my life?)
- I also think I've gotten better at lineart and shading ever since I've started just using the pencil tool for drawing. Recently I've also been trying to color in a way that makes me less line-dependent.
- My comics have been all over the place -- awkwardly wrapped up book 3 of Tisquantum, drew very few satisfactory Cap comics, and a handful of Rutabaga comics. But ... I don't know what I actually want? Do I still want to tell a longform story, a la Tisquantum? (And if so, what?) Or do I want to go the observational/educational comics route, a la China Comics/Rutabaga? What draws me to comicking, anyway? And what can I do with this medium that I can't do with, say, teaching? What are the stories that I *can* tell, and *want* to tell? I want to tell stories about women -- living, interacting. But in short, 10-20 page lengths. (Tisquantum is too long.) Maybe a short story in comic form and then some longer text blurb? maybe start with my mom

That is, if I have time. I still want to teach, but if I start that again, that'll be a LOT of work. (Rewarding work, but a lot.) And just to get back into teaching, I'm going to have to spend the next few months transitioning the company *and* doing job applications. Good thing I'm mostly done with moving.

(I'm really happy with the home purchase, so ... yay!)

Somewhere in the mix of all this is the whole fandom thing. (Creativity, social interactions, organization, etc etc.) I wish my chosen fandom had more women. Maybe I can use it to push myself toward slightly longer stories, or at least experiment with the format/tone. And find ways to interact that approach the warm-fuzziness I feel from real life friend hangouts.

Anyways, it's late, so... here's to 2017. I'll do the resolutions tomorrow. After taiko, probably.
summercomfort: (Default)
2016-12-30 11:35 pm

Happy Birthday to Me

I got to sleep in until 9am because Jono held the baby in the morning. And then in the afternoon we left the baby with my brother, and went to watch Moana! It's a pretty good cartoon movie. Holy shit I hope this makes every little kid want to learn wayfinding and explore the world. I'm really happy about some of the messages in the film, specifically:
1) Exploring the world does not preclude leaving home forever (it doesn't have to be the ocean or the family, it can be both!)
2) Exploring requires the right boat and the right tools (I love that Moana *packs* for her trip.)
3) You need to be ready to learn new skillsets (like wayfinding)
4) It's okay to give up / reject your destiny if you don't feel ready for it.

Basically I love the ocean in the story.

And then we had yummy family dinner and yummy cake, and Rutabaga was a powerful force for distraction.

I should do my typical year-end reflection but ... am tired. Gonna do a quick doodle draft" to fulfill my "work on something creative" and go to bed. There's still taiko tomorrow.
summercomfort: (Default)
2016-12-29 09:47 am

(no subject)

Well, my fears of Jono's burnout has come to pass, in the form of an illness that he just can't seem to shake over the past week. Hopefully today will be the day?

Anyway, pretty big to-do list today -- hopefully I'll get through most of it!

Work:
- finish picking vocab for flashcards
- insurance payment
- payroll
- CD codes for that school
- plan meetings for next week

Other stuff:
- make quiche
- do dishes
- buy: dish detergent, diapers, oatmeal
- tidy up the house
- hangout with Q for lunch
summercomfort: (Default)
2016-12-02 11:03 pm

To Do list

By 3pm tomorrow:
- look over payroll info
- print out payroll slips
- write 30 checks
- buy baby food

By 1pm Sunday:
- take recycling to parents'
- drop off Good Will bags
- label moving areas?? At least bring over some extension cords?

(Now to see how much of the payroll stuff I can do tonight.)